I knew things were going wrong when my childhood memories had to answer to stockholders. The disney company, which owns the rights to Winnie the Pooh, have decided to tinker with story. Christopher Robin has been given his walking papers, replaced by a "tomboyish six year old girl".

I'm not sure the idea of of Winnie the Pooh hanging out with a peppermint pattie wannabe is a good idea. Having plumbed the depths of hollywood creativity, knowing how Hollywood loves stereotypes, it's only a matter of time before this new bastardized creation devolves into a three stooges rip off with this new unnamed tomboy character smacking Tigger.

As anyone who has known me for more than ten minutes will attest, I'm not one for getting weepy about childhood memories. However, I'm starting to get a little irritated with the ongoing revision of historical stories. I keep hearing rumours that Beatrix Potter is going to be "updated and modernized".

To Hollywood, I say this "leave my memories alone you bastards".